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Arab wedding traditions: «Now the average price of kalym is 100,000 dirham»

28.02.2019

Arab wedding traditions: «Now the average price of kalym is 100,000 dirham»

Marina Gafi, 27 years, hometown — Roslavl, housewife

Country: Egypt

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About the acquaintance


Four years ago I was vacationing in Sharm El-Sheikh, where I met my future husband. He proposed to me and a few weeks later we were married by Orfi document. It is a document made by a lawyer and can be easily terminated. It allows you to live in the same apartment. With this contract, we went to get acquainted with his parents.

In his parents' house, I asked his mother about the life and culture of the Egyptians. In my husband's family, there are many foreigners — uncle is married to an Englishwoman, cousin is married to a Dutchman, another to Canadian and other lives in Singapore.

At marriage in Egypt is a custom to present a bride gold and diamonds. The same day we went to the store and bought wedding rings. Mother-in-law offered me a diamond gift. I chose earrings and a pendant.


About wedding preparations


Before marriage, newlyweds need to have the approval of the parents. Parents look at the financial situation of another family. A wealthy man does not marry a girl from a simple family. Other cases happen if the bride is a foreigner.

If parents agree with the candidate, they deal with the details. At this meeting, issues such as the salary of the groom, housing, the number of monthly payments to the bride, the number of wedding expenses and the bride's dowry are resolved. The bride buys all the furniture for the groom's house. Weddings in Egypt are paid in half by two parties.

According to tradition, in Egypt, the husband fully provides the wife with financing. The spouses agree on a specific amount of monthly payment from the husband. If the spouse does not provide the wife with financing in the marriage, then she can complain to his parents.

If the spouse does not provide the wife with financing in the marriage, then she can complain to his parents

After such a discussion, the date of engagement is set. An engagement usually takes place in a hotel or at home. On average, about 100 people are invited. The bride wears a dress similar to the wedding but more modest. The groom presents diamonds. And then begin the preparation for the wedding.

Between the engagement and the wedding can past several months or several years. Families repair the house, buy furniture, prepare for the wedding. If during this time the groom changes his mind, the bride keeps diamonds as compensation for moral damage.

When the families are ready, they sign a marriage contract. It prescribes the amount of money that the husband will pay his wife in case of divorce. The signing of the contract is not a festive procedure. Then, the wedding will be held within a few days.


About weddings


In Egypt, people like luxurious weddings. Often the cost is equal to the cost of newlyweds housing. At weddings, there is a large number of guests — 500-600 people. Families try to choose the best hotels in Cairo, inviting a photographer, singer, dancer, making gorgeous scenery and treats. Many girls who cover their heads with a scarf, take them off at the wedding to once in life in public appear without a scarf.

Most weddings in Egypt are non-alcoholic and start at nine in the evening and end at one in the morning.

After the wedding, the couple, close relatives and friends go to the hotel, discuss the event and in the morning go to the SPA. After the celebration newlyweds go on a journey. After nine months, almost all newlyweds have children.

At the same time, Egypt has a strong stratification of society and not everyone can afford such life.


Jamila Bagautdinova, 44 years old, hometown — Makhachkala, fur business

Country: UAE

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About the acquaintance


I am a mother of five children, and we live in the capital of the UAE — Abu Dhabi.

In 2008, I moved to the Emirates with my two children from my first marriage. My future husband and I met when I was working in a fur coats shop. He was watching me and had serious intentions. And now I'm married to an Emirati. My husband has a big family — 11 brothers and sisters.


About wedding preparations


In the UAE, in most cases, parents are searching for a girl for a son. Women gather on holidays and there look for a bride to the son. Girls are getting married only with the agreement. If she is ready to get married, the guy comes to her house. He should come with older sisters or aunts and mom. During this meeting, young people can exchange a couple of phrases and looks. Then they give an answer if they are ready to marry or not. They both have the right to refuse.

If they agreed, then negotiations on what the dowry the man's family pays for the bride. You can do this in the form of gifts or money. Now the average price of kalym is 100,000 dirham. Also gold, ring, earrings, necklaces as a gift.

Three days before the wedding, all the girls gather mothers, aunts, friends, relatives and classmates. They organise a buffet lunch and invite Hindus that good draw in henna.

A man should allocate money to a woman for personal expenses. If this rule is not followed, she can go to the family court. Women's rights are respected here. She can go to court for any family problems.

A man should allocate money to a woman for personal expenses

In a divorce, the family is given three months to establish a relationship. If divorce is initiated by a man, he must provide with financing his wife until the age of majority of children. And if divorce happens at the will of the wife, she loses everything because couldn't adjust the relations with the husband.


About weddings


Betrothal, henna day, wedding - all steps from beginning to end are paid by the groom's side. The approximate number of guests — 400 people.

The wedding itself takes place separately — men in one room, women in another. At weddings, women wear luxurious and expensive dresses. At the end of the event, the groom comes for the bride. At this point in the women's hall announce that now groom will enter the ceremony. And all the women in the hall are immediately wearing black abaya and sheila because man comes into the hall. The hall turns from luxurious and coloured to black in a second. He takes the bride, and after that, the event lasts a couple of hours. At weddings, it is unacceptable to give gifts and money.

Albina Eshmeeva, 30 years old, hometown — Naberezhnye Chelny, blogger


Country: Egypt

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About the acquaintance


I moved to Egypt in 2010 and met my husband online. I was afraid to go to another country, because I heard about the reception of foreign women in Egypt, especially in the villages. But everything was okay.

The attitude of the family to me warm and tender. They call me daughter and help me with everything. The Egyptians are friendly people, and they love Russia and therefore respect me.


About wedding preparations


Weddings in Egypt are different, it all depends on the purse. A year before the wedding held a procedure of giving gold to the bride, as much as she wants.

Now Egyptians are dating and only then they meet with parents. But in some villages, even relatives can marry each other. The father of the bride chooses the groom himself. And the groom's family has to pay a certain amount for the bride.


About weddings


In Alexandria held gorgeous weddings. Weddings start at eight in the evening and end at three in the morning.

Usually, the wedding takes place in two days. The first day or night of henna. This night, women and girls gather before the wedding. And the next day it is a wedding.

At weddings in Egypt do not drink alcohol, but despite this, people laugh, relax and have fun

People with little income do not feed a guest at weddings, and they just give a coke and a piece of cake. But there is also a luxurious wedding, where a buffet and two hours for a meal. After that, the food is cleaned, and there are clean tables with flowers. At weddings in Egypt do not drink alcohol, but despite this, people laugh, relax and have fun.

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